You don’t have to be positive all the time

sour face

Sometimes I just feel this way! (Credit: photo by James Fielden)

Are you a positive person?  Do people often comment on what a positive attitude you have?  If so, I’m guessing that when you don’t feel so positive, you may actually feel guilty about it.

I’m a pretty positive person, and I like being that way.  And I have to remind myself that it’s OK not to be positive 100% of the time – in fact, it’s downright healthy to allow yourself to have ups and downs.

Today my daughter asked me how I was doing.  I said “I’m having ups and downs lately, but mostly I’m OK.”  She said, in her young years of wisdom, “You need those downs to recognize the ups.”   Wow, was I impressed that she said that!  (I’m such a proud mom).

Having the ups and downs is part of the human experience.

That is what I teach my meditation students.  Meditation isn’t about being in a constant state of bliss and turning away from the parts of life that are tough.   It’s about feeling the way you feel.  Having meditation as a regular practice in your life does indeed usually provide a sense of peace and calm, and helps tremendously to deal with stress.  But don’t expect it to make you 100% blissful.

So for all you ‘positive’ people out there, please allow room for yourselves to experience life, and don’t put too much pressure on yourselves to always be positive.

Experience your life and notice your emotions and reactions. Make it a conscious event to decide how you will react to things.  To make life more interesting, see if you can observe yourself having different emotions and moods, and then realize it’s all temporary.  When you’re having a bad day or just feel crabby, see this crabbiness as a visitor, and know it will go away.



2 thoughts on “You don’t have to be positive all the time

  1. Great view, there are some sad events in life and we need to grieve them and be real, so nice of you to bring light to this topic, thanks

    • Hi Al, yes indeed. All those emotions – sadness, anger, grief, happy, joyful, etc… it’s all part of being human, right? Sometimes we put pressure on ourselves to be happy and positive all the time; at least I think I do that sometimes.
      Thanks for writing 🙂

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