It’s OK not to be OK

drowning and needing help

Everyone needs help every so often

Life’s really tough at times, isn’t it?  Sages and spiritual leaders are often helping so many people by giving advice on how to be happy. Many say our purpose is to be happy.

I know the pain of being unhappy and I know I’m not alone in this. Each one of us has had and will continue to have life’s ups and downs – it’s part of being human. We cannot know happiness without having felt sadness.

I am absolutely honoured and blessed when someone opens up to me about what in life is getting them down.  When I can help somehow or even just offer a confidential ear, it’s a gift to know I am trusted.

The point of this post is simply this – it’s OK to be unhappy, stressed or feeling like nothing is going well. However, my request to anyone reading this is to be aware of when you are in such a state, and make an effort to get help. Whether that help comes in the form of re-grounding yourself with techniques that work for you, calling on a trusted friend, or getting counseling help – it’s all OK.  Don’t be afraid or ashamed. 

Don’t kid yourself that everyone around you is doing perfectly great and you’re the only one suffering.   We all have our problems!  Most people just hide them very well.

So have the human experience. Be self-aware.  Be your own inspiration to take a healing action.


19 thoughts on “It’s OK not to be OK

  1. Well said. Too many people hide their problems away, thinking that they are the only ones, or perhaps they’re ashamed, or don’t want to be too much of a burden. Honesty is the best policy. I guarantee you that many people around you can relate……and some will be very helpful!

  2. Wendy,

    I could not agree more on what you are saying. Precisely my last post has to do with that… I had someone really close to my heart who was not able to hear the same message you are trying to convey today within these lines. It is ok NOT to be ok!

    • Hi Gina, it is a shame when someone puts so much pressure on themselves, isn’t it.
      Thanks for your comment, I appreciate it! Have a wonderful day.

  3. Great post Wendy! Just the other day on a walk I was pondering why it is there is so much darkness in the world and not more light and came to the conclusion it’s all about balance. There must be darkness so we appreciate the light. The same could be said for being sad vs happy. Thankfully with great doctors and a fantastic husband, I’m experiencing more light than darkness!

  4. Wendy, how nice for your friend to know she was safe to sit with you and have you with her to witness her sensations, you are a kind soul

    • Thank you Ivsrao. If we all accepted ourselves more for who we are, I think we would have so much more peace in our lives. We don’t have to compare ourselves to others or create stories in our minds about how we should be.
      Have a wonderful day,

  5. This is so true. Not being Ok is definitely Ok. We should not pretend to always be fine and “all together”. It is important to admit to our deficits and limitation, After all, we are simply humans.

  6. Excellent advice Wendy. I remember when I went through depression that I didn’t think anything would help because I had tried antidepressants and I talked about my issues with my girlfriend at the time quite a bit (I have no idea how she put up with me), and nothing helped. Antidepressants were just a numbing band-aid that did nothing to address the root causes of my depression. Several close friends and family suggested counselling, but I remember telling them that I didn’t think counselling would work – after all, I talked about my depression to my girlfriend and it wasn’t helping, why on Earth would talking to a total stranger help? But finally, as a last act of desperation, I got on a waiting list to see a psychotherapist.

    Within two weeks of starting therapy, I was feeling better than I had in nearly 20 years. I continued seeing him twice a week, then just one morning a week for 2 years. That was 15 years ago, and I haven’t experienced depression since.

    I am sharing this story in case there is someone out there who feels the same way, but hasn’t tried psychotherapy yet. It worked for me – completely turned my life around.

    • Ken, how good of you to share your deeply personal story. I’m sure it will help those who read this. I believe there is a place for anti-depressants, but I believe more strongly in addressing the root cause of the problem. I live my life humbly by knowing that I don’t know everything, that there is always something to learn. So I am a big proponent of professional counseling/psychotherapy. It is important, however, to know that if seeing one doesn’t work, then to find someone else. Getting a good ‘match’ for yourself is very important, and they all have their own techniques. Even finding a spiritual healer, if this resonates for an individual, is another good option.

      Thanks again Ken, I really appreciate your openness and helpfulness,

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